Things to Ponder

Eholi Wohali ©Things to Ponder

There are few qualities if any, that are more important than maintaining a positive attitude amidst adversity. Even the most gifted people must continue to work and strive and carry on, even when things don't look so good or feel so good, if they desire to achieve their goals. Throughout history most of the great achievements have come only after multiple, if not countless, failures. The individual, team or organization simply made a choice to adopt an attitude of persistence, and it paid off in success. On the front porch of an old farmhouse, hanging from a rusty nail, is a sign that says much about the farmer who had lived there for 75 years and about the value of persistence. The sign reads: "Burned out by drought, drowned out by flood, ate out by jack rabbits, and sold out by the sheriff - STILL HERE!" Everyone has faced or will face adversity, challenges, or obstacles. The determining factor for your success in the coming years will be:

The purpose or end result for an individual is a specific goal or image of achievement. Put another way, this means seeing "the whole picture." The worker who finds satisfaction in his or her labors understands the big picture and sees how he or she is a part of it. Hard work is just that: hard work. Always see the ultimate goal you're working for and the benefits that come with its successful achievement. For the nurse, it's the extension of the quality and quantity of life. For the bank executive, it's understanding that each customer is working and saving, as he or she is, toward financial security. These are the Visions that take us through the monotonous details and carry us to the top.

"Lisa" came to NY City fresh out of college, looking for a career in publishing, but no one was hiring. Economic necessity made her take a job as a server in a coffee shop. Undaunted, she did her best. She behaved professionally and always greeted each person with a smile and a kind word. Several months later, a regular customer said to her, "I bet you aren't waiting on tables all the time. What else do you do?" "Well," she replied, "I'd like to become an editor. I'm working evenings here and going out on job interviews during the day." As it turned out, the man was a prominent literary agent who needed a bright, energetic assistant. He arranged for an interview, and she got the job. She was on her way.

Lisa put into practice the principle of keeping the end result in sight. She instinctively knew that her restaurant position was not a stumbling block but a stepping stone. It's not so much what the job offers you. It's what you bring to the job. Lisa is an example of a great actor in a small part. Hang on to your dream when that's all you have to hang on to. No matter what you do, what position you occupy, give it your best effort. Your abilities, like muscles, are strengthened through exercise. No one is put in a place to osmall to grow. There is no work umworthy of a job well done.

Attitude is the way you view your life, your experiences, your environment, your opportunities, your problems, your choices and your responses. Attitude is the direction in which you lean on all ideas and issues. It's either failure-reinforcing or success-reinforcing.

Winning and losing is all about attitude. Attitudes begin as harmless thoughts. Then, with practice, they become layered by habit into unbreakable cables to shackle or strengthen our lives. We're scarcely aware they exist. Like comfortable beds, they are easy to fall into but difficult to get out of, once settled in. First, we make our attitudes, then our attitudes make us. Attitude is the servant of all the great individuals who have ever lived and, of course, the servant of all the failures as well. There is little difference between common people and those who are uncommonly successful. The little difference is in their attitude. The big difference is whether the attitude is positive or negative. Your attitude is either the lock on or key to the door of fulfillment. How important is your attitude? In truth, attitude is everything. We are not responsible for what happens out there, what others do or think. We are responsible only for how we choose to think and behave. That's our attitude. It is a precious, personal possession

A human resource executive went out in the field to determine how laborers felt about their work. She went to a building site. She approached the first worker and asked, "What are you doing?" The worker snaps back, "What are you blind?" "I'm cutting these boulders with primitive tools and putting them together the way the boss tells me. I'm sweating under this blazing sun, it's backbreaking work, and it's boring me to death!"

The human resource staffer quickly backed off and retreated to a second worker. She asked the same question: "What are you doing?" The worker replied, "I'm shaping these boulders into usable forms, which are then assembled according to the architect's plans. It's hard work and sometimes it gets boring and repetitive, but I earn money to support my family. It's a job. It could be worse."

Somewhat encouraged, the human resource staffer went to a third worker. "And what are you doing?" she asked. "Why, can't you see?" beamed the worker as he lifted his arms to the sky. "I'm building a cathedral!"

Communication today can be summed up as the process of two people engaged in a self-serving diaologue in which one person is simply waiting for the other to finish talking so he/she can begin talking again. Master communicators believe that paying value to another in the form of active listening is the greatest communication skill of all. Our concern should be for the other person, not ourselves. When we have other people's interests at heart, not just our own, we listen, and the other person can sense it. If you think back on the people who had the most influence on you, you'll likely find that they are the people who really cared about you, and were genuinely interested in you, your well-being, and listened to you. So many people say, "So and so never listens to me!" Ask yourself whether it is their listening or your own listening that is the problem.

An older man made an appointment with his doctor for a physical. He went into the doctor's office and sat down, but then confided that he didn't really need a checkup. Rather, he was a little concerned about his wife's hearing. She was a little defensive about getting older and he didn't want to upset her by bringing up the possibility that she was losing her hearing. He asked his doctor what he could do to determine how bad her hearing was, short of bringing her in for tests. The doctor suggested that he go home and, while his wife was in the kitchen, he should go to the back of the house and start calling her name. If she didn't respond, he was to move forward and keep calling her name until she did respond. Then he could estimate the distance and report it to the doctor. He went home and found his wife cooking dinner in the kitchen. He quickly went to the back of the house and called her name. No response. He moved forward into the living room and called again. Nothing. He went to the dining room and called. Still no response. Finally, he opened the kitchen door and called her one last time in desperation. She turned around in frustration and said, "What do you want? I have already answered you three times!"

A lady was in her fifties when her husband died. She was forced into a major life change. At that late stage in life she went for improvement. She went to college and became a school teacher. Meanwhile, 200,000 other people her age began slowing down and making excuses for letting their bodies and their minds drift into a state of disrepair. Is age a viable excuse to quit seeking improvement in life? There are many people who have accomplished fantastic things after they reached their 75th birthday. How did they accomplish those things? They kept seeing things that needed to be done and they went after it.

Colonel Sanders started the Kentucky Fried Chicken business after he began getting social security checks! And all because he wasn’t afraid to reach for improvement after his hair turned white

You don’t have to be like someone else to find your place of importance. Diversity and individuality are the spice of life. If you are miserable where you are, maybe you haven’t found your ‘niche’ in life. Uselessness and futility are the marks of one who has not yet discovered his hidden potential. An undeveloped "gifting" is often the cause of deep frustrations. But, he who never looks will never find. He who never struggles will never achieve. A craving for approval sometimes keeps people from expressing their true selves. It locks them into a rut of conformity and mediocrity. They will never go beyond that which other people approve. Fear can also cheat a person out of fulfilling an inner challenge. Fear paralyzes the soul. Be bold. Dare to step out and experiment with life. Just because it has never been done before doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be done. Columbus dared to be different. Edison loved to experiment. People who make a difference often do things differently.

Be Yourself ! and be willing to become more than you are right now

Have you ever wanted to ‘change someone’ to fit your idea of what is good and right for them? Has anyone ever tried to change you? We want others to be more like us so that we can have something in common; so that we can be comfortable around them. Married people sometimes try to bend their mate’s nature to fit their own preferences. How many jokes have you heard about women who drag their husbands to the mall on a shopping trip? Are we really supposed to be just like everyone else around us? If that’s true, then should we all be ‘passive’ or should we all be ‘aggressive’? Should we all like ‘olives’ or ‘avocados’? Does anyone love oatmeal? Does anyone hate oatmeal? How about liver? Somewhere in all of this there is a balance. We learn to give and take, adjust and adapt. Compromise sometimes seems like a dirty word and yet at other times it is the only way to peace.

There was this 17 year old boy I knew some time ago. He came from a single parent family and was giving his mom a hard time. But underneath all the frustration and rebellion, there lived a good kid with great potential. One day, while standing on the porch, I saw him coming home from school. He was angrily hitting trees with a stick and viciously kicking rocks out of his way. He didn't know I was watching, so I moved out of sight and let him come around the corner. Later that evening, we were talking, and I inquired how things were going and he gave some kind of a mumbled , sullen answer. "What's the matter?, I asked, "Did you have a test today?" He turned his eyes away from me and came up with a low-keyed, "Yeeesss!" When I asked what his score was on the test, he hung his head and muttered angrily, "34!" "Praise the Creator!" I exclaimed. His head shot up and his eyes jumped around in confusion. Disbelief was expressed in words as he said, "I tell you, `I made a 34 on a test,' and you say "Praise the Creator?" "Yep," I laughed. "why not?" I went on to ask him which class it was. When he told me it was Algebra, I asked him if he had ever taken Algebra before. He admitted that he hadn't, so I told him, "That grade of 34 tells me you know 34 per cent more about Algebra than you did before. Your teacher may call it failure, but I call it learning, I call it progress! "Besides that", I said, "that's not the last act in the play, it's not the final chapter in the book. You are not stuck with that grade forever. You can go back and keep learning and take another test. Next time you may make a `54'. Again, the school may call it failure, but I call it progress, I call it improvement, and I would shake your hand to your success! Your understanding of Algebra would be up another 20% from where you are today. How can anyone call that failure? You started out knowing nothing!"

Your weaknesses represent your greatest potential for improvement. Is there something that keeps holding you back? Improving that one thing, could make everything else you do, vastly more effective. Remember, a chain is only as strong as its weakest link. If one or two things are holding you back, it doesn't matter how well developed you are in other areas -- you're still held back. One of the best uses of your strengths, is to work on overcoming your weaknesses. All too often we use our strengths to compensate for our weaknesses. Most people manage to get by, by doing this. Just think, though, what would happen if instead, you were able to completely overcome the weaknesses, once and for all? Then, instead of fighting against your own weakness, you could fully apply your strengths toward success and accomplishment. Don't be your own worst enemy. Acknowledge your weaknesses, and get over them.

The time is never perfect, yet the time is always right. If you're waiting for the perfect time to take action, a time when all conditions will be ideal, a time when your prospects for success are guaranteed, that time will never come. Circumstances are never perfect. There are always plenty of reasons not to act. Yet, if anything is going to get done, it must be undertaken in less than perfect circumstances. When you accept that there will never be a perfect time, then the time is always right. Circumstances, whatever they are, will work for you, when you go to work in spite of them. The unfavorable conditions, such as they are, are things that can be overcome. Right now is not perfect, but it's what you have to work with. You either use it, or you lose it forever. Now is not the perfect time, but it is the right time to begin reaching for your goals. Do it now, or regret it later.

Do the best that you're capable of. Any less is cheating yourself. Those who get the most from life are those who give the most. Give your best, and you bring out the best in others -- your customers, your employer, your family, your friends. Because you are committed to being the best that you can be, you tap into your full potential as a person. Your power and effectiveness in any endeavor, come from your own commitment to excellence. There are countless opportunities each day to do your best. It doesn't need to take more time, or more resources -- just a change in attitude. To make your life the best it can possibly be, you just need to do the best you can possibly do. Unleash your own incredible potential -- always do your best.